


The Patron Saint of Matchmaking and Mischief

by kaerstyne



Category: Dragalia Lost (Video Game)
Genre: Bad Matchmaking, Ensemble Cast, Hijinks & Shenanigans, Humor, M/M, Scheming, Valentine's Day, side Luca/Ranzal
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-26
Updated: 2019-12-26
Packaged: 2021-02-26 08:26:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,630
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21966373
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kaerstyne/pseuds/kaerstyne
Summary: In honor of Valentine's Day, the residents of the Halidom hatch a plan.
Relationships: Curran/Heinwald (Dragalia Lost)
Comments: 4
Kudos: 44
Collections: Yuletide Madness 2019





	The Patron Saint of Matchmaking and Mischief

**Author's Note:**

  * For [PluralForce](https://archiveofourown.org/users/PluralForce/gifts).



_Prologue_

After Dragonyule and New Year's had both passed, the residents of the Halidom had all worked together to take down the various decorations and generally get the castle back to normal. It had been just as much of a production as putting the decorations up in the first place, and after a hard day's work, a particular group of residents had retired to one of the castle's many private sitting rooms. Ranzal had decided there was no time like the present to crack open the bottles of Hinomotoan liquor he'd convinced Sazanka to give him, and they'd all been more than happy to grab glasses of it before sprawling out on the comfortable furniture.

Of course, that had been a few hours ago. By now a few of them had passed out, either from exhaustion or alcohol, and the rest were pleasantly lethargic and at least a little tipsy. Ranzal was in the former group and was sound asleep in a chair, mostly not snoring; Luca was in the latter group and was sitting on the floor, using Ranzal's legs as a backrest, and gesturing to the others with his half-empty glass when he talked.

"So," Luca said to the room at large, after the previous topic of conversation reached a lull, "any ideas what we should do for Valentine's this year?"

"Isn't it a bit too soon to worry about that?" Cleo said from the other chair. "It's still a month and a half away."

"Yeah, but last year we didn't get started until right before, so we had to scramble to get everything together. Seems like it would be a good idea to at least start thinking about it now, so we have time if we want to do anything big."

Cleo squinted at him. "I have to admit, that's more foresight than I expected of you."

"I can plan things sometimes!"

Notte, perched on the arm of Cleo's chair with a shot glass half her size, giggled. "Suuuure you can. So what did you have in mind, Mr. Planner? Something for Euden again?"

"I mean, we could." Luca shrugged. "It's always nice to show your appreciation for people, right? Or we could do something different. I'm open to suggestions."

"Oh, I have a suggestion." Malora pushed herself up into a sitting position on the couch. "Gratitude is all well and good, but I think we should do something more romantic this year. That's what the holiday's really about."

"Yes," Elisanne said from the other end of the couch, "but it's difficult to do a big romantic event when most of us aren't in romantic relationships."

"That's exactly what I'm saying!" Malora grabbed the liquor bottle on the floor next to Orion and refilled her glass, holding it in the air as if to emphasize her point somehow. "Not nearly enough of us are in romantic relationships! It's an absolute travesty, and we should do something about it."

"I'm in." Orion snatches the bottle back from her. "What do you propose, my lady?"

"With as many people as we have here at Halidom, surely there are some that would be good matches for each other, no? I propose that we find them and try to get them together." She took a large sip from her glass. "Starting with a few obvious candidates, like, say, Curran and Heinwald."

"Ohhhhh." Notte pounded her fist on the chair. "I like it, I like it."

Elisanne frowned. "Are you certain they even like each other? They argue constantly."

Malora just laughed, and Luca said, "That doesn't mean they don't like each other. I mean, Ranzal and I argue all the time, and obviously _we_ like each other."

"Yes, but you and Ranzal don't like each other _romantically_. It isn't the same."

They all stared at her for a long moment, until finally Luca said, "Uh, Elly, you know Ranzal and I are dating, right...?"

Elisanne sputtered and almost choked on her drink. "You _what_?!"

"It's really super obvious," Notte said. "Like, to anyone with eyes. They were literally making out in the foyer last week, with tongue and everything."

"Also Luca got drunk on Dragonyule Eve and was serenading Ranzal from the ground in front of his balcony," Orion said. "Half the castle could hear him."

"But..." Elisanne still looked flabbergasted. "Since when?"

Luca shrugged. "A few weeks ago? I mean we were eyeing each other before that, but that's when he actually asked me out."

"I... Well then. My apologies for not noticing before now." Elisanne stared at her glass for a moment, then downed what was left of her drink in one gulp. "So, you think Curran and Heinwald could have a similar sort of dynamic?"

"Yes!" Malora stole the bottle back from Orion again and refilled Elisanne's glass. "Have you seen them together? They already act like an old married couple, it's absolutely delightful. Clearly they just need a little push to realize their love for each other."

"What sort of push did you have in mind?" Cleo asked.

Malora grinned wickedly. "Well, there are a few options..."

* * *

_Mission 1: Malora and Orion_

The first step, Malora insisted, was to plant the seed, to make sure both of them had romance in their thoughts during the later stages. The method was simple, she said: Send them both letters from a secret admirer, leaving them wondering who might hold such affections for them.

She assigned herself and Orion to the task, as the biggest romantics in the group, and the two of them set about writing the most absolutely florid letters they could manage, full of elaborate metaphors and exaggerated prose.

(It was at this point that Elisanne expressed doubt that Curran and Heinwald could possibly think the other had sent these to them, and Cleo expressed doubt that they could possibly think _anyone_ had sent them in earnest. Malora and Orion scoffed at these doubts; they were experts, they insisted, and their art was nothing less than perfect.)

Notte was the one tasked with delivering the letters, as her wings and small size gave her excellent stealth capabilities. She waited until each man was definitely in his room, then deposited the letter in front of the door, knocked sharply to announce its arrival, and retreated to a hiding place at a safe distance to watch.

Heinwald, much to everyone's distress, did nothing interesting; he opened the door, picked up the letter, and shut the door again without so much as a change in expression. " _Booooring_ ," as Notte put it. Curran was a bit better---he actually read the letter standing in his open doorway, brows creasing as he took in the words. This was an excellent sign, according to Malora, as it meant he was thinking a lot about the letter's contents.

(Cleo thought it just meant he was having a hard time reading Orion's overwrought handwriting, but she was overruled.)

* * *

_Mission 2: Luca and Ranzal_

The second step of Malora's matchmaking plan was to make sure Curran and Heinwald got some time alone together, that _wasn't_ focused on fighting fiends or hunting down heretics. The latter was the difficult part, since the two didn't seem to meet regularly when Curran didn't have a case, but once again Malora had the perfect solution.

Luca and Ranzal, who had volunteered to be in charge of the mission, would pick a new restaurant in town that they wanted to visit, and invite some others to join them. Ezelith and Xander, while not part of the original drunken planning, were more than happy to volunteer their services once the situation was explained to them. (Having more people along was key, Malora said; Curran and Heinwald would be more likely to agree to a larger outing.) Curran and Heinwald were then invited along, supposedly on the grounds that they were the first people Luca and Ranzal ran into who were available on the chosen day. (Chosen, of course, for being a day that neither Curran or Heinwald had anything else to do.)

When the day came, however, Luca gave Curran his apologies---a last minute issue had come up, and he and Ranzal wouldn't be able to make it. It was a shame, but since they'd already made the reservation, the rest of them might as well go ahead and enjoy it without them. On the other side of the castle, Xander gave Heinwald the same story: he and Ezelith were being dragged into some "trivial nonsense far beneath someone of his glorious stature", but the rest shouldn't let that stop them from partaking.

Thus, when Curran and Heinwald arrived at the restaurant, they discovered they were the only ones in attendance. Luca and Ranzal, in disguise at another table, watched their reactions carefully. Curran, upon hearing the news, shrugged and waved at the reserved table in a "might as well" sort of gesture; Heinwald nodded, and the two of them sat down.

The meal lasted for an hour, during which Curran and Heinwald appeared to be engaged in spirited conversation. They both ordered wine, and toasted to something before eating. They even, to Malora's later delight, split a chocolatey dessert.

All in all, the whole event was considered a rousing success, meaning it was time to move on to the next stage of the plan.

* * *

_Mission 3: Mym and Notte_

The next stage, as Malora explained it, was hopefully the final one. Now that the targets had been primed for romance, and set up on a successful date, they would just need one last push to realize their feelings. Something to make them see each other from a different angle.

As it turned out, Malora meant this very literally.

Mym was enlisted for this stage, as her boisterous personality would make the scenario more believable. (Mym had, technically, been present for the original drunken planning, but had been unconscious on the floor by the couch for the duration. She'd been highly disappointed to discover she'd missed out on hatching a plot.) Notte would provide support if needed, and Cleo and Elisanne were responsible for getting Curran and Heinwald to the right place at the right time.

And so on a particular day, Elisanne casually ran into Curran in the foyer, and asked him to deliver a message to Euden. Meanwhile, near the kitchens, Cleo happened to see Heinwald, and asked him if he could get an ingredient for her from the garden patch outside. The timing of these two requests, and the starting locations of the requesters, meant that Curran and Heinwald would pass through the same hallway at the same time, where Mym was waiting for them.

When the two of them arrived, headed in opposite directions, Mym and Notte were engaged in an animated discussion of a new battle technique, and Mym was demonstrating some of the particulars. They did move out of the way when they saw the two men enter the hall, but when Curran and Heinwald were about to pass each other, Mym became too passionate with one of her demonstrations, and, in a carefully calculated accident, thrust her leg out between them and managed to trip both of them at once.

All three lost their balance and fell over, Mym straight down to the floor, Heinwald straight backward to the floor, and Curran straight forward onto Heinwald. (Mym was really very pleased with herself for figuring out exactly the right angle to achieve this; there had been _math_.) Curran and Heinwald crashed down in a pile of limbs, Curran sprawled on top of Heinwald, their faces only centimeters away from each other.

There was a long pause as everyone present digested what had just happened. Then Heinwald made an indignant noise, and Curran scrambled off of him, stammering an apology. Mym made her own apologies, offering to help Heinwald to his feet, and Notte fluttered around everyone making concerned noises.

According to Mym and Notte's recounting later, Heinwald mostly looked irritated, but Curran's face had had a pink tinge to it, and he'd shot Heinwald lingering glances even as the two of them went their separate ways. Malora and Orion both agreed this was a _very_ good sign, and that they should be seeing the fruitful results of their plan any day now.

* * *

_Mission 4: Cleo and Elisanne_

And yet, for two weeks there was nothing. Valentine's Day was fast approaching, but there was no sign at all that anything had changed in Curran and Heinwald's relationship. Sure, they still worked together all the time, and constantly bickered like an old married couple, but there was, as Malora put it, no more _spark_ than before. She was very distraught, and gathered the rest of her co-conspirators together for an emergency meeting, where they worked out the _final_ final stage of the plan.

What they came up with had the same starting point as the previous mission: get the two of them in the same place at the same time. Luca and Ranzal handled the requests this time, and both came up with convoluted but reasonable explanations for why they really needed someone to go visit the tertiary pantry right away. Once Curran and Heinwald had both arrived, they had only a few seconds to acknowledge each other's presence before Elisanne slammed the pantry door closed, and Cleo locked it securely from the outside.

Then they retreated to the end of the hall, and they waited.

It was a good twenty minutes before the pantry door burst open again, a blast of shadow magic knocking it out of its hinges and to the floor. Heinwald emerged, looking exasperated, and Curran followed after, with a similar expression. They both stared down at the door for a moment and exchanged a few words, then headed off down the hallway in opposite directions. And that was that.

"I don't _understand_ ," Malora said. "They should be all over each other by now! Locking them in a closet together _always_ works!"

"Maybe you were wrong," Elisanne mused, "and they really just don't like each other that way."

Orion shook his head. "No, there's definitely a vibe there. They're just...oblivious, or something."

"Perhaps," Cleo suggested, "we should simply cut our losses and come up with a different idea for our Valentine's celebration."

They all mourned the loss of time and potential budding romance, but agreed it was probably for the best.

* * *

_Epilogue_

"Do you think we should tell them?" Curran asked, setting down his cup of tea. "That we're already together?"

"Nonsense." Heinwald took a sip from his own cup. "Let them stew a while longer. They deserve it for all their ridiculous meddling."

"I feel kinda bad for them. They did put in a lot of work."

"But they were _terrible_ at it." Heinwald grimaced. "Their methods were juvenile and painfully obvious, even when they were trying to be subtle. They'd need far more advanced techniques if they really wanted to make me suddenly fall in love with someone."

"I'm pretty sure they were counting on the whole 'close partners' thing to make it less sudden."

"If I wasn't already sleeping with you, you tripping and falling on me in the hallway would not make me want to."

Curran coughed. "It was sort of nice."

"Is that your way of saying you want to be on top more often?"

"I'm just saying, we should stop stringing them along like this. Malora's starting to look downright depressed."

Heinwald sighed and drained the rest of his cup. "Tell you what. Why don't we go back to that restaurant for Valentine's Day, order another of those desserts, and then I kiss you in the middle of the restaurant in the most disgusting public display of affection I can muster?"

"Sounds perfect."

_The End_


End file.
